Early in the morning of the 27th of September, a group of highly-trained but obviously pop-culture starved astronomers managed to entirely miss the battle cry of the vanguard of a honed and ready for conquest legion of what is almost certainly bug-eyed monsters, or possibly giant mutated insectoids from a low-gravity planet. While searching for pulsars, which broadcast a short-burst intermittent wave completely dissimilar to this massive radio burst from more than 3 billion light years away, they encountered the phenomena, which is undoubtedly encoded with a complex information burst, probably hostile. Oh, yeah. While we should be girding up Earth's collective loins for battle and unifying the various countries under a single banner for humanity's future - possibly led by Bill Pullman - "scientists" are regarding this signal as a step toward researching supernovas and black holes, distractions from the real event - universal conquest by a multiplicity of opportunistic alien war machines bent on complete domination of our entire solar system, planet, and way of life. Of course, the signal may be a deliberate distraction sent by our potential future masters, or perhaps the death knell of a conquered civilization, a last-ditch mortality cry echoing across space to alert us to the hazards that even now speed through the black void on a rendezvous with the third rock from Sol, blissfully spinning on it's axis, a blue marble target in the Milky Way.
The thing is - it's always the lunatic who talks like this who's right about the aliens.
