Consider this my contribution to whatever GOTV efforts with which you may be involved.
I am sick and fucking tired of the keening mewl that is rising from substantial portions of this country that goes something like this: "Oh, I am so sick of this election. I just hate politics. I will be sooo glad when all this is oooover." The Squidbag has two words for these people - SHUT THE FUCK UP. And yes, the Squidbag is aware that's four words, but the Squidbag will not be lectured on grammar and indeed, math, by the likes of you. Be quiet, the lot of you. I have absolutely had it with this shit, this idiotic whining in the streets of an apparently fatigued electorate who just cannot take another minute of being deluged by election coverage. Take a day off. Don't watch TV, listen to the radio, or read anything for a day. Give it a shot. It means pulling your greedy little mouth off of the media teat for 24 hours, though. Think you can do it, you pathetic gripe in people clothes? For fuck's sweet sake, we can follow an NFL season, or a season of Lost, we can talk endlessly in the workplace about American fucking Idol or Dancing with the loser has-been Stars, but we can't seem to summon up the wherewithal within our void little souls to continue to care about this election until it is over? What an ADD fucking country this is. You know the only reason we don't get daily Afghanistan or Iraq reports highlighted in the news is because you moron doorknobs got tired of it, right?
The saddest, most digustingly vomitous part of this whole shitty bitching and complaining bullshit is, many of these people will not even vote, because "they're so tired of it all," or because they just don't think it makes any difference. These are the same people who have to have dinner with Uncle One-Toothed John before they can remember to brush a couple of times a day. These people will be fucked and not know why - but you can bet they'll know how to fucking bitch about it. "Hey, loudmouth, your Aunt Kvetch is on the phone, and she wants her nametag back, you whining, small-minded jerkoff." Democracy is wasted on these fucking people.
Suck it up, tired America. Stiff upper lip and all that. Wait, that's the English. Well, who gives a fuck; stiffen your lips anyway. No one gives a shit that you're tired, right? No one wants to hear that shit. you add to the noise by saying it, and then you make me add to the noise to put you in your fucking place. You're part of the problem, there, mouthy. Go vote, be quiet, and don't let me hear any more of your puking whine noises, or I will go door to door on a Squidbag Shuts Your Big Yap tour, carrying a hammer, a stapler and a crooked stick festooned with broken glass, red ants and habanero.