The Supreme Court upheld the Federal Censoring Commission's ban on "fleeting expletives" earlier this week, but may still at some point in the future have a reasonable discussion about whether or not this is an infringement upon free speech, with the obvious answer being: Of course it fucking is. Still, I hope they have the discussion. This is not a reasonable provision, it protects no one from anything. This is not fomentary language or shouting "FIRE" in a crowded cigar store, this is just uptight people who don't want to hear "bad" words on television. Sissy Mary punks, all of them.
I did like Justice Scalia's reference to Cher & Nicole Richie as "foul-mouthed glitterati." He's just jealous that he can't swear and wear a backless thong outfit in public and get away with it. But under the robe, who knows? I suspect John Roberts does. You heard it here first! That Bad Man Clarence Thomas acknowledged - even while siding with the majority - that the Internet & cable / satellite TV are still fertile grounds for content that would be considered objectionable under this rule. Of course he did this with a sly smirk playing across his lips as he sipped his Coke & pube cocktail, thinking about his vast collection of TiVo'd softcore and cache of barely legal world wide wank.
You know what should be illegal under FCC guidelines? I mean, as long as we're restricting speech anyway, I have some suggestions. Any morning TV show featuring the sound of a baby crying. Gone. This is at least as inflammatory as the crowded theater thing, and inspires many of the same reactions, albeit on a smaller, more intimate level. The sound of a cop's siren on a car radio. That should be illegal. Once again - a restriction I could use, instead of my government protecting a theoretical lowest common denominator from the word "shit." (Which is in Disney's Flight of the Navigator a couple of times, by the way. Think our culture's coarsened? Find "shit" in a recent Disney film.) Of course, I'd also probably go nuts at the FCC and figure out a way to illegalize sore loser Republican bitching, hate speech, reality television, televangelism, the ShamWow putz and anyone else yelling about fucking products, meaningless cell phone calls in public places, FOX News & their ilk, and the millions of spams about expensive pens, Christian singles, and new photo galleries I get several times a day.
So it's good that I'm not in charge. I guess.