Yesterday on his satellite radio show, Jamie Foxx made comments about Miley Cyrus that you've all likely heard by now. Last night, he apologized - via the Leno show - for the stuff he said, reminding the world no less than four times, "I'm a comedian." His press people reminded also reminded all those not laughing yesterday that "Jamie's show is a comedy."
"These are the jokes, people." The best comedians never have to tell you.
I'm not a fan of Miley Cyrus, (though "Fly on the Wall" isn't bad) but it seems to me that anyone actually trying to keep their head above the mud of show business should not be dragged down by someone who needs material for a fucking radio show. And what is Jamie Foxx, anyway? A guy who associated himself with Redd Foxx (no actual association exists) has some acting chops, and got huge by pretending to be Ray Charles - which he did amazingly well, don't get me wrong. I actually like Jamie in movies, but based on the R-rated vitriolic crap he spewed at a girl his daughter's age in front of the world yesterday, I now have to wonder if he's one of those actors who's such a good chameleon because he has no personality to begin with. He calls himself the "black Howard Stern," but I'm not sure anyone needed that. Now he gets to come off like a disgusting degenerate - someone who is requesting a sixteen-year-old in a sex tape? Many younger performers spin out and get weird - all the way from Diff'rent Strokes to Miss Lindsay, but when someone doesn't - fuck, leave them the hell alone.
Supposedly, Jamie was dressing Miley down for pitching a bitch about not getting to meet Radiohead. You would, too. There's some dispute as to whether or not she was kidding, but just for a minute, think with me: Those of you who have to deal with 16-year-olds regularly, imagine, and those of you don't, attempt to remember what you were like at 16. Now imagine that you don't get your way, after building something up in your mind. Imagine being upset, or dealing with that angry, disappointed (probably a little a lot spoiled) 16-year-old. Now imagine that the format of your rebuke to that teenager includes public humiliation, suggestions to begin using crack & catch a venereal disease, and a career in Internet porn, among other things. Some of you have jobs where you'd be arrested for talking to children that way. Does that strike any of you as a mature and thoughtful response to someone's bad behavior, or does it seem more like the ravings of a shitheaded junior pop star who suspects he's peaked as a performer, and now has to watch a 16-year-old singer with a TV show have the #1 movie in America?
You're a whiny bitch, Jamie, just like your boy Kanye. You're a punk and a shitty comedian. You don't think - perhaps because you lack the capacity - about the far-reaching effects your comments will cause. Thousands of articles, the opportunity for Miley to take the high road, erosion of your popularity with a younger generation, people asking why you weren't this upset about Chris Brown, and racist fucks just crawling out of the woodwork to make comments in local papers like "I guess Jamie thinks he can say whatever he wants now that his Affirmative Action President is in charge." You can't just unhinge your lower jaw and let your lizard brain talk - you have to think as well. You've come off like a leering, jealous, bitchy little prong over this thing that's not even a thing.
Plus, there's ripping off Bill Hicks, which even though all comedians do it now, is unforgivable. What a dick.
I did think the Lindsay Lohan egg thing was funny, though.